When I was a little girl, every year I made the same resolution…to keep my room clean. I swear, for years I declared that my room was going to be the most organized living space in my house. My bed was to be made promptly every morning, clothes put away and shoes aligned neatly in rows. Well, for years I never succeeded in my self made promise. I never make my bed in the morning, it takes me a week to put my clothes away and my shoes are all over the place. Clearly, I am a bit of a mess, so why did I continue to declare that same resolution?
Every year around this time people from all over the world reveal that “this year will be different”. With bellies full of bubbles, magical laughter and hopeful hearts we profess change. Now resolutions come in many forms, weight loss, smoking, career changes, the ending of a unhealthy relationship…you get the point. But what we are all really saying is that this year, I am going to show up as my best self. I am going to STOP doing something to START something else because whatever the hell I am doing now is exhausting. You crave change.
But I ask, do you really want change?? Change is going to be hard, so for real..think about it.
Well let me tell ya, showing up as your best self, your true self, your happy self, your most successful self doesn’t happen January 1st. Sorry to let you down. Before you immediately write me off, here is the deal. I am not saying that January 1st is not a good day to start achieving your goals….I am saying however that it takes SO MUCH more effort than that.
First of all, weren’t you already thinking of at least one of your resolutions last year? There had to have been a point in time during the year that you wanted to either end or begin this goal of yours, am I right? For example, this blog was not something I just decided to try one day, I thought about it for a few years. Other years I told my self I was going to find the perfect guy, yet I stayed in a shitty relationship or was very very very single.
We see this a lot in business too. Many organizations get this NYE feeling when their new calendar year starts. Like all of a sudden because we turned the calendar page one day we are magically going to hit the number we didn’t even get close to hitting the last year! Or, we are going to enhance culture when everyone comes back feeling “refreshed” from our holiday time off. Not.going.to.happen.
To me, resolutions and goals are the same thing, yet a New Year Resolution is way more sexy and exciting to talk about. Plus, people ask you what your NYE Resolution is! How often, outside of work, do the people around you ask you what your goals are? What the status of your goals are? Why you decided to go after X goal? Why is X goal important to you? If I had to guess, probably never. But I bet that many many people around you ask between December 25h and January 15th questions like those that are tied to that super sexy and exciting new shiny version of yourself is.
Becoming Wiza is a continuum. It is about reflection. It is about evolving. All year long.
The most successful women and business leaders in the world don’t make resolutions, they make reflections…and they do it often. They set goals and review them. They get the right people around them that they trust to share and hold them accountable. They are Becoming Wiza every step of the way, every month of the year.
Here are some questions to consider as you too begin your year of reflection.
What is my goal, be specific! We have to get the the end zone at some point. Don’t just say you want to lose 50 pounds, start with 10! The touchdown is scored one play at a time.
Why is that my goal? If you don’t take it seriously, don’t expect anyone else to. This may take some serious self reflection and coaching but why is it important that this is achieved? Will it make you happier? Make your life better? Or, are you taking the easy way out and you aren’t truly trying to better your life or those around you. Leaders don’t make easy goals, plain and simple.
Who does my goal impact other than myself? The saying it takes a village comes to mind with this question. Your decisions always, always impact those around you. For example, launching this blog means me taking time away from the people in my life to focus on this project. It means I might have to say no to watching a movie one night with my fiancé or not going to wine night with the girls to brainstorm a new idea. Our time with the people we love is valuable, to achieve your goals you might have to have a pointed conversation with those around you. Then, refer to my previous point that if you don’t take it seriously, they won’t either.
What are my deadlines? This is my least favorite step. I am such a scatter brain and inconsistent, that in my world, goals are not achieved unless I have a deadline….AND that I have someone to hold me accountable. It could be my fiancé, family members, friends, colleagues, whoever but if I really want to achieve something I have to say it out loud to someone or I will never do it. THEN, check in, reflect on what went good, what didn’t, adapt & forward. Just.keep.moving
The final step: Celebrate yourself. Brag to everyone who will listen, buy the shoes, take the trip, dance, pop the damn champagne and take a sip!
Leaders don’t make resolutions and you shouldn’t either. Whether or not you are leading in the workplace, in the home or both, Becoming Wiza about your life takes reflection. Get you pens out or whatever fancy tech. tool you have and start reflecting. Don’t just keep making the same resolution like it’s a wish and think it will magically happen, make it happen. You have every skill already within you to achieve your tale of success.
Becoming Wiza 
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