But seriously…like so many feelings. I posted on Monday a picture from our babymoon on Instagram and said how I’m actually feeling kinda sad realizing that our days as just the two of us are limited. I mean, I have literally cried when I think about it too long. You would think that a luxurious beach vacay would cure these somewhat “baby blues”, but I swear it only made it that much more obvious. In my “mourning”, I am also so excited and happy for this baby boy we’re having! (Read about our gender reveal here) I am #becomingmama and couldn’t’ be more joyful for this next chapter in my life…but it wouldn’t be that way if it wasn’t for my husband and our marriage that came first.
Our dynamic will surly change this fall, priorities will be different..damn we will be lucky to even sleep come November. I am not naive to that, I am ready for the chaos and blow out diapers. Still, it is incredibly important to me that I don’t lose sight of my marriage. We are ALL IN for this life…give it all to us..kids, house, mess, dogs, hell maybe even a damn minivan one day. But how do I make HIM feel like he hasn’t taken a huge back seat as this belly grows? How do I make sure he isn’t my last priority everyday while I try to sooth a screaming baby that I’ve been home with for 10 hours?
Let’s be real, you don’t have to even be expecting to remind the special person in your life that they matter. Our careers take hold of our lives too, family and friend obligations never stop, the calendar is full weeks in advance…you get the point. As wives, partners, mothers, friends…how do make our guys feel good in the middle of the mess?
4 WAYS TO MAKE YOUR MAN FEEL THE LOVE BEFORE BABY:
Go on a Babymoon
Like a gender reveal party, babymoons have become super trendy over the last 5-10 years. I have to say, this is a trend that I hope never goes away or never seems “ridiculous”. We went down to the beach for a week, got tons of sun, laughed, flirted, and talked all day long. We got to connect without interruptions. Our biggest decision every day was whether or not we should go to the beach or the pool. Maybe the beach isn’t your thing, or a week away isn’t something you can budget before baby, no worries! I still encourage you to pause life and go on a stay-cation with your partner. Will we never be alone or be able to go on a trip alone again? No…but we all know that it will be a while. A babymoon is just another way to connect during this time; by doing so your man will feel just as important as the little miracle you created together.
Take Him on a Date
We rarely ever go out on a “date night”. In fact, our best “dates” are eating homemade pizza in our living room while drinking champagne. When we do go out on a traditional “date”, Noah plans it all. He picks the place because I cant decide for the life of me. He drives, he pays, opens doors, even buys flowers. Having a baby shouldn’t be the reason I all of sudden “take him out” but he deserves some love too! So last week, I shared on Instagram how I took him out for dinner and a movie. The chivalry part didn’t last long when I tried to open his door and all that stuff…didn’t fly. Probably not the best look for a guys pregnant wife to open “his” door, but I was trying to pull out all the stops! My point is, I love a good date night for many reasons but mainly because it shows me that he cares! With the baby coming, date nights like a week long trip at the beach will be harder to plan. So, get them in now ladies! Plan one for your man, take him out to his favorite place, go to a game, play poker, go golf, spend the afternoon at the spa…anything. He will LOVE it and it will totally make him feel the love until most of the attention goes back to us mamas.
Chuggies and Huggies Party
This is another trendy millennial reason to party…that is totally genius! Want to know why, because since we announced our pregnancy it has been “How’s Alyssa feeling, How is Alyssa doing, How is Alyssa adjusting”. NOBODY has ever asked him, “hey Noah, how are YOU feeling, how are YOU doing, how are YOU adjusting”? No, he’s not the one physically pregnant or dealing with the hormones or growing belly. But, dang he’s still about to take on one of life’s most important roles! The baby shower we all know isn’t really for the dad…even if they go or if it’s co-ed, it’s for mama. So, call a few of his buddies, ask them to bring a pack of diapers and let him be celebrated too. Maybe you ask his friend to book a tee time and after they grill up some burgers. Maybe his buddies treat him to a football game, or they go do whatever it is that guys do…just tell them to bring a pack of diapers to celebrate the new daddy-to-be. #dadsneedlovetoo
Words of Affirmations
Simple enough, but guys need to know just like we do that they doing the right things. Telling your boo that he is going to be the best dad because of the qualities he has will make him feel great. Again, being a father is a big job, he will have his own doubts on parenting. He will be nervous, some men might be straight up terrified…just like we are. So simply saying, “hey babe, you’re going to be a great dad because you are so patient” (insert quality of your own here…but you get it) will make him feel good during this pre-baby time. Like I said, even if you’re not expecting yet, sending your man praise every now and then will make him feel good.
As much as we are #becomingwiza in the lives we are building for ourselves, so are the men we have chosen to partner with through it. We are all just figuring it out. So if you’re in a bit of mourning like me as your time as 2 narrows, enjoy the time you do have and give your daddy-to-be a bit of extra lovin during this season so he doesn’t feel like yesterdays news.
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Such a good post and obviously so relatable for me :)!! Love all of your tips! Such good ideas!!
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